Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
