Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
