I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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