I just made out with a guy for $7.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
