My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
