My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
how does that bad decision feel?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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