her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
