Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
