he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
