He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
