Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Randomize
