okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
