paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
