How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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