i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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