She's JV to your varsity
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
