can we get nightvision for the apartment?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
