What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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