can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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