6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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