How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
