just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
