u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
