I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
