another moral hangover. fuck.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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