similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
