You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
we have officially lost it.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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