just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
