Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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