Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
