Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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