I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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