i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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