but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
