hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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