Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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