Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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