"it" just moved
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
