You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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