'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
