I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Are we still banned from the library?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
