so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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