But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
