i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You ate ashes out of my bong
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
