Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
