I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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