Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
