White coat. Heels.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize