I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I should be sponsored by Trojan
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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