I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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