Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
