Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
